God BlesS TexaS!

At long last sweet friends………..it’s Vacation time!
Partaay!

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This city girl is grabbin her hubby and headin out to Texas! texas-flag-ani.gif

OMG…I must poke a lil fun of my Texan buds before I get there k?
Indulge me.
Oh wait. They’re real big on firearms aint they…

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Maybe I ought to…aw..never mind………here goes! cowgirl3.gif

A map of the USA accordin to Texans: heh

Things You won’t Hear a Texan Say: cowboy.gif

We don’t keep firearms in this house.
You can’t feed that to the dog.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
I just couldn’t find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
My fiancee, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany’s.
Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
Checkmate.
Elvis who?
“I’ll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex”
Duct tape won’t fix that.


Yankee vs Southern Zoo

What’s the real difference between a
Yankee Zoo and a Southern Zoo?

On the cage, a Yankee Zoo will have the
name of the animal and then the scientific name in Latin.
A Southern Zoo will have the name of
the animal and the recipe…..!

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Survivor, Texas-Style

Network TV is reported to be developing a Texas version of “Survivor,” the popular TV show.

Contestants must travel from Amarillo through Fort Worth, Dallas, Houston, San Antonio and back to Amarillo, through San Marcos and Lubbock. Each will be driving a Volvo with a bumper sticker that reads: “I voted for Kerry, I’m gay, and I’m here to take your guns.”
The first contestant to complete the round trip is the winner.
laugh-ani.gif

I will try to throw up some brilliant, witty posts in between all the runnin round..and I promise to TRY to visit y’alls when I can rub a few seconds together! cowboy-2.gif

Straight shooting over to my friends at Perri Nelson’s Website, Blog @ MoreWhat.com, A Blog For All, DeMediacratic Nation, Big Dog’s Weblog, Adam’s Blog, Right Truth, Maggie’s Notebook, Leaning Straight Up, The Bullwinkle Blog, The Amboy Times, Conservative Cat, Pursuing Holiness, third world county, The World According to Carl, Pirate’s Cove, Blue Star Chronicles, Nuke’s news and views, and Planck’s Constant, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

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57 Responses to “God BlesS TexaS!”

  1. Debbie says:

    Are you driving or flying? Drive through Tennessee and see me. Have a great time.

  2. Veritas says:

    Angel, GREAT POST! Look me up when you get down here if you’re anywhere near Houston and Johnson Space Center.

  3. Lawman says:

    There are definately worse places to visit than the Lone Star State. I spent many wonderful days exploring Houston, Dallas, San Antonio, San Angelo, and other places in Texas.

    Hey Debbie… What part of Tennessee are ya in? I’m originally from the Gatlinburg/Pigeon Forge area.

  4. Perri Nelson says:

    Have a good time in Texas Angel.

    Oh… and DO remind them that Texas is Alaska’s LITTLE brother :-)

  5. Kevin says:

    Ouch, going to Texas in the middle of the summer? You’ll soon learn that you made a bad decision for your vacation locale :) . Unless you are heading to Padre Island of course.

  6. Terry_Jim says:

    Have a great trip!
    When you are over fly-over country,
    roll down the window and give us a wave!

    Be sure to copy and use this helpful map for your trip
    http://www.mullings.com/steinberg.jpg

    And you should know…
    The latest telephone poll taken by the Texas Governor’s office asked
    whether people who live in Texas think illegal immigration is a serious problem.
    29% of respondents answered:
    “Yes, it is a serious problem.”
    71% of respondents answered:
    “No es una problema seriosa.”

  7. Strawberry says:

    Alaska may be larger in land mass but Texas is a whole other country!!! Nothin’ better – it’s Heaven on earth. You know the joke about making phone calls to Heaven don’t you? NYC, Chicago, LA, Salt Lake City, OK City, and most other places in the world, it costs $10,000 to make that call. In Texas – it’s only 25 cents! Why – you ask – cause it’s a local call from here!!! :) Enjoy the trip – it will be great!

  8. Right Truth says:

    Is your pension plan invested in Iran? Stop it now…..

    Did you know that millions of pension fund dollars are invested in companies doing business with Iran? Missouri has already removed its investments from Iran and Ohio, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, California, Texas, Georgia, Louisiana, Michigan and Florid…

  9. KarLMmM says:

    Have a great time Angel…do not forget about us here, waiting for your words and pictures etc. of wit, wisdom and humor.
    Remember…
    If you’re Gonna Play in Texas, You Gotta Have a Fiddle in the Band
    and…
    There wouldn’t be no Alamo
    No Cowboys in the Super Bowl
    No “Lonesome Dove”, No “Yellow Rose”
    If it wasn’t for Texas.

    I wouldn’t be a Willie fan
    Nobody would swim the Rio Grand
    I wouldn’t be an American
    If it wasn’t for Texas.

    Fort Worth would never cross my mind
    There’d be no Austin city limit sign
    No Lone Star of any kind,
    If it wasn’t for Texas.

    I’d never gone to Tennessee
    to sing my songs and chase my dreams,
    Only heaven knows just where I’d be
    If it wasn’t for Texas.

    Fort Worth would never cross my mind
    There’d be no Austin City limit sign
    No Lone Star of any kind
    If it wasn’t for Texas.

    It made me the man I am,
    Thank God for my old stomping ground.
    I wouldn’t be standing right here right now
    If it wasn’t for Texas,
    If it wasn’t for Texas,
    If it wasn’t for Texas…i think you get the idea…enjoy!!!!

  10. Strawberry says:

    Karl – I love it!!!!

    Angel – Girl – you have been tagged. If you’re not aware of what it means, check out my site. If you have time during all this travelin’ drop a few tidbits of trivia about yourself! :)

  11. Incognito says:

    Have a great trip Miss Angel! I love Texas! Have driven through several times. And the nicest of people.

  12. Big White Hat says:

    All joking aside, come see me. That is if you will be in my part of Texas. I won’t travel more than 200 miles to see you.

  13. sayitlikeitis says:

    U & your hubby should have a grand time in TEXAS, beat the heck out of any liberal, left wing, muzzlin lovers that u find in the lone star state. Enjoy the hot weather and use lots of sunscreen.

  14. » God BlesS TexaS! - Online Information NEWS & Entertainment Portal says:

    [...] Read more at Angel [...]

  15. benning says:

    I hear the Armadillos are so big down there they put saddles on ‘em!

    Have fun!

  16. Always On Watch says:

    Watch out for that Texas heat! It can creep up on you. I know from personal experience when I came down with heat exhaustion on one of my visits to Texas.

    Enjoy your vacation!

  17. michael says:

    OT, but you been tagged!

  18. Defiant_Infidel says:

    HA! Benning is, as so usual, correct! The armadillos are ridden home quietly with the conveyed rosie vision of being domesticated and well cared for…

    Then they are shot and grilled!

  19. Angel says:

    THANKS THANKS all! Miss ya already!!!!

  20. Panhandle Poet says:

    Outstanding, Angel! Have fun…

  21. Frasypoo says:

    Have a great time….Texans seem like a lot of fun and so friendly…

  22. velvethammer says:

    Yee haw! Our Angel is saddling up and riding into Texas. lol

    Have a great time and be sure to apply sunblock, ’cause it will be hot hot hot.
    But it is a dry heat dontcha’ know. ;)

    Can not wait to hear of your Texas adventure.

    Happy trails!

  23. WordBearer says:

    Have a good time Angel. I am in Houston, the weather is muggy (it aint a dry heat), and I just bought a new gun two days ago. I love Texas.

    Other things you will not hear a real Texan say:
    1. I’m just not in the mood for a steak today.

    2. Those cowboy boots are just too tacky to wear in the wedding.

    3. Hey, can I get some soy milk in that?

    4. No I don’t feel like going to a strip club tonight.

    5. Wow that new Prius is one hell of a car.

    6. No I don’t think I should bring my gun along.

    7. Non-fat dressing please.

    8. This room could sure use a woman’s touch.

    9. No I can’t recommend a good taxadermist.

    10. You know who really knows something about manhood, the French.

    11. I don’t want any trouble.

    12. No beer for me, just a Fuzzy Navel blended nice and frothy.

    13. I am too drunk to fish.

    14. That was the best quiche I have ever had.

  24. cube says:

    Have fun in Texas. I’ve never been, but it sounds like a blast.

  25. Connie McEntire says:

    Texas is the best place you could ever be. You just don’t know what you are missing unless you have been there. I love it. It has something of everything. I know you will enjoy your visit. Have fun. There are some of the most friendly people in the world that live in Texas. So have fun.

    I like most of your jokes , not all. I am too protective of things that I love.lol connie from —–guess where, TEXAS, of course. Maybe we will pas each other somewhere on the trail.

  26. freedom now says:

    Of course Austin is the anti-Texas and some Mexican Americans are La Raza Communists.

    I’m just playin’ da devil’s advocate!!!!!!!!!

  27. freedom now says:

    Have some Texas-sized fun out there!

  28. WordBearer says:

    Yeah Austin sucks. I grew up in Southeast Texas (Go Bulldogs) and then went to college in Houston. All of my friends who went to Austin came back as huge libs.

    The city needs to get rid of the hippies and Greenies. Would not live there if you paid me.

    The La Raza people are bad here in Houston. I see at least 4 “La Raza” bumper stickers a day. Heck last week they even had a little formal pro-illegal protest infront of my office on Memorial.

  29. Layla says:

    Angel have a great vacation and be safe! I am so happy you will finally be able to get so R&R!!!! Be safe my friend! Blessings and hugz to yah!

  30. Bar Kochba says:

    Enjoy Texas!

  31. Gayle says:

    Angel gal, be really careful if you get out of the car alongside the road or at a rest stop. Texas is full of fire ants. Hon, if you step in a nest of fire ants you’ve had a horrible experience! These ants hurt really bad and they are everywhere right now because we’ve had a lot of rain. I swear this isn’t a joke. Be careful!

    I don’t know what part of Texas you are going to, but Central Texas is undergoing a grasshopper invasion. They don’t bite, but keep your mouth closed while walking around in the great outdoors. :)

    Other than that, Texas is a pretty fun place. Heh!

    God bless!

  32. Next Stop Lauderdale says:

    Angel, have a good vay cay!!!!! … steve

  33. Angel says:

    SO FAR SO GOOD BUDDIES!..NOT MUCH CHANCE TO POST…MISS Y’ALL!…GOTTA GO PRACTICE MAH SUTHERN ACCENT..lol :)

  34. Lady Jane says:

    Angel! Have a wonderful time with your family! Don’t get a sunburn!

  35. Yankee Doodle says:

    Have a great vacation!

    And,

    Don’t Mess With Texas!

  36. Ogre says:

    “Duct tape won’t fix that.”

    What? That’s not a Texas thing, that’s a MAN thing!

    Have fun and relax a bit!

  37. brooke says:

    You have a GREAT TIME, girl; you deserve it!!!

  38. Donald Douglas says:

    Great and interesting vacation post — and hilarious! Hope you’re having a great time!

  39. Joe Gringo says:

    Enjoy the time off! Texas in June…..I love it!

    I’ll be in Dallas on tuesday and possibly Austin on Wednesday, if you’re in that part of Texas, the first cold one for you and your husband are on me!

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  44. New Zogby poll on immigration « Nuke’s NEWS & VIEWS says:

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  45. Angel says:

    THANKS FOR THE WELL WISHES AND LINKS FRIENDS! BE BACK SOON!! :)

  46. no2liberals says:

    ‘Come Back To Texas’ lyrics

    She said she needed a break
    a little time to think
    but then she went to Cleveland
    with some guy named Leelan
    that she met at the bank

    There’s nothing wrong with Ohio
    except the snow and the rain
    I really like Drew Carey
    and I’d love to see the Rock n’ Roll Hall of Fame

    So when you’re done doing whatever
    and when you’re through doing whoever
    you know Denton County will be right here waiting for you….

    Come back to Texas
    Its just not the same since you went away
    Before you lose your accent
    and forget all about the Lonestar State
    There’s a seat for you at the rodeo
    and I’ve got every slow dance saved
    Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway

    I think I made a mistake
    Its not that easy to take
    She went to make a deposit
    then she cleaned out her closet
    Guess I’ll sit here and wait

    For her to come back home (I’d wish you come back home)
    it shouldn’t take very long (so long so long)
    I bet she misses the sunrise
    and Mrs. Baird’s fruit pies but I could be wrong

    So when you’re done doing whatever
    and when you’re through doing whoever
    you know Denton County will be right here waiting for you….

    Come back to Texas
    Its just not the same since you went away
    I bet you missed your exit
    and drove right on through the Lone Star State
    There’s a seat for you at the rodeo
    and I’ve got every slow dance saved
    Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway

    Troy Aikman wants you back
    Willie Nelson wants you back
    NASA wants you back
    and the Bush twins want you back
    Pantera wants you back
    and Blue Bell wants you back

    I got a premonition
    I’m taking a petition
    and the whole state’s gonna sign

    Come back to Texas
    Its just not the same since you went away
    Before you lose your accent
    and forget all about the Lone Star State
    There’s a seat for you at the rodeo
    and I’ve got every slow dance saved

    Come back to Texas
    Its just not the same since you went away
    Before you lose your accent
    and forget all about the Lone Star State
    There’s a seat for you at the rodeo
    and I’ve got every slow dance saved
    Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway
    Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway
    Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway
    (Bowling For Soup)

    Just be sure and steer clear of Austin, it’s the walled fortress of liberalism in this big friendly state.

  47. JR says:

    Hi Angel,

    be well my friend. I hope your family enjoys, my family is in Katy Texas-the west part of Houston…

    Take care!

  48. Gayle says:

    no2liberals is exactly right. It’s like the liberals in California congregating in Los Angeles and even moreso in San Francisco. Austin is our San Francisco. Yech!

  49. obob says:

    put yourself in a Lone Star state of mind, grab a Shiner Boch and enjoy the tumbleweeds. THey do seem to have a little independant streak in themselves in those parts. You should stop by and visit Cindy Sheehan’s property anddo illicit things there if she hasn’t sold it by now

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  51. Hillbilly Willy says:

    Willy wants to go to Texas too. Stop by Arkansas and take Willy with you!

  52. Martin says:

    LOL Angel, wonder if we all crisscrossed in midair! So, how do ya like the 100° weather and the rain? Seriously though, hope y’all enjoy my home state/country, hold down the fort, and keep my horses fed till the locals here kick me outta Philly and DC. :p

    p.s. Try the Road Toad à la Mode – it’s the best!

  53. michael says:

    The first contestant to complete the round trip is the winner.

    Now that sounds like a REAL survival test!

    Have fun in Texas!

  54. Dapoppins says:

    My hubby is from Texas! Have fun!

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  56. vegas art guy says:

    Where the heck did you find that sign? And what lane do you take if you’re blind drunk? :lol:

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